Oh Gosh...

It's been way too long, hasn't it?? work and other related damages have been getting in the way. Will be back...
:)
V.

On Sleeping and Other Related Damages

My husband and I have been spending a lot of time apart recently- mostly because he's been traveling a lot. Now, whomever leaves the communal bed cannot complain about what happens when the other is gone- and what I mean with it is reverting to pretty basic single-sleeping habits.

I love my single sleeping habits- mainly what in Italian is called "Dormire a 4 di bastoni", sleeping like the four of clubs. If you have ever seen Italian playing cards, you know exactly what I am talking about. If you haven't- well, here's the image that explains it all. I get to sleep withe each appendix pointed toward a different corner of the bed- and it's FANTASTIC!

I love being married and all, but the feeling of having a whole bed for yourself- man, that's the one thing I miss the most about being single! (How pathetic this statement can be is the subject of a whole new discussion!)

In any case, once he comes back it's always a bit hard to readjust- especially if I manage to get to bed before he does. So, there I am completely spread over the bed, and he's struggling to make it back in- with not much success of moving me, walking me up, or any of the easy outs you can come up with.

So, the other night it was reversi. He managed to get to bed before me, fall asleep completely on my side of the bed, and managed to stick an elbow out in defensive posture. So, I get to bed and I have to slide in, barely fitting in the small sliver of bed between the elbow and the bed edge. And once I get in, the elbow is securely fastened to my central vertebrae. And not only he does not move by gentle poking and rolling, he also refuses to give up the elbow, no matter how much I push him away. And he snores. In my ear, because I can't move.

The biggest payback of all times...

On "The" Suitcase

Last week we were at dinner at some good friends' place. They live in an area where we've been looking for a new house to rent, so we stopped by and ended up staying for dinner. We had a great time, especially because we learned about The Suitcase.

Our friends have been married about 20 years, so they have A LOT of experience on being married! They keep all their luggage in their garage for when they travel, except for a single suitcase that resides in the master bedroom's closet. Apparently, every now and then- and always in turn!- one of the two gets so fed up with the other that starts packing to leave. We were incredulous!!

"What do you mean you pack to leave??"
"Well, either me or her get so pissed off with the other we decide we're going to leave. So while one packs, the other goes and bothers: "Did you remember the underwear?", "Have you packed enough socks?", and so on. We usually make up before the suitcase is closed!"
"Wait- don't you feel a bit silly every time you pull out the suitcase screaming "I'm leaving!", knowing you won't really?"
"Well, every time we really think it's going to be the last time we do it!"

And I thought we were weird because we always speak Italian, but we argue in English!

On Not Quite Understanding the Strategy...

So, you are a husband, right? And you know your wife keeps a blog, right? Let's ASSUME for a second that this blog is about marital life. Can you please tell me what would make you not check- let alone BOOKMARK!- your wife's blog?? Because, really, I don't get it.

I've even thought of opening it up to him for counterpointing, because I was feeling guilty about blogging about him! I guess the offer is gone, and since "What he doesn't know can't hurt him"...

I think I'm back to blogging... :)

On Knowing Where It Hurts

My husband yesterday was complaining about a paper he has to write. It's a final for a negotiation class where he has to lay out the plan for his life. I know, I didn't ask either.

"I can write it for you: "My plan is to go back to being a husband!""
"No, it needs to have something to do with negotiations!!"
"Okay, so, "I negotiated with my wife that at the end of this block I am going to go back to being a husband and not a roommate.""
"Am I being a roommate?"
"Yes, but not a Gug-like roommate. A Christophe-like roommate."

I know that without knowing the details of our previous living situation this is going to be a hard reference to catch. Nevertheless, I got back today to a clean kitchen and to trash taken out. Knowing where it hurts really does miracles.

On Training and Other Marriage Truths

I have not been able to stop thinking about this article all day. (The link is not optional. Anyone who's married should thoroughly read it!!) My boss forwarded it to me, as a result of me sending him this other article, which is a geeky look into toilet seats. As genial as it is, it seems to be true, too. I have been trying to apply these training techniques for a while now, but only as an amateur, and today, after reading the brilliantness of Amy Sutherland, I saw the light.

I was all wrong. I was trying to ignore a negative behavior, true, but I was not rewarding the positive one! The freacking laundry basket that had been sitting in our bedroom for over two weeks, and I was determined not to mention it. Even though I was running out of underwear. Even if there were clothes there I had almost forgot I could wear. To be true, I have to say it didn't work. I had to burst out when a suitcase joined the basket (for two days!), and nag in the worse possible way! But maybe if I had started kissing when the basket disappeared, I would have gotten better results? I am setting out to training camp. Let's see if Amy is right!

On Being Suspicious

Last week my friend was here, and life is not smiling on her. So, my husband was asking me how she was.
"Not too good," I replied, "I think I should really try hard to spend more time with her this summer."
"Sure. You can go there any time you want. Actually, maybe you can meet somewhere else, once in Seattle, once in LA, once in Vegas... During the summer you should make time and spend your weekends with her."

How nice. How incredibly great. "You really have a great one," said my friend, "It's almost too good to be true!"

Uhm. Too great??? Does he have an affair and he's just trying to get rid of me???